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TGB
Western women are always putting men down, telling them how bad they are because they are men.
The media hyper-sexualization of men is much worse than that of women, to the point that the vast majority of men can NEVER live up to that ideal (all a women has to do to live up to the ideal is to not be fat).
So how do western women expect their men to be confident, when they treat them so bad?
Just Me - Why can't you feminists tell the TRUTH for once, instead of creating straw men? Or is that too hard for you?
Answer
First of all, "The media hyper-sexualization of men is much worse than that of women"... how, exactly? I am sorry, but I just do not think that there is any way that you could make this argument. if one was to look at any magazine stand, and seek out the stereotypical male/female magazines (say, maxim and cosmopolitan), one would realize that first of all, there are MANY more male magazines that are centered around sexualizing women. Most "female" magazines discuss celebrity gossip or fashion. Second of all, looking inside these magazines, one can easily see that men's value comes from their personality traits (being especially loving or committed), while women are valued primarily for physical characteristics (flat stomach, curves, etc). "sexualizing" someone is seeing them in only objective sexual terms, so there is clearly more sexualizing of women going on here.
But disregarding this, I still do not see how unrealistic media expectations can be equated to treating someone poorly. The media always portrays extremes because that is what is interesting to the public. Stories about superheroes with six-pack abs exist to provide entertainment, not to show what all men should be like. Yes, they are seen as cool and distantly ideal, but women don't expect you to act like Ryan Gosling in The Notebook any more than you expect them to look like Victoria's Secret models. Women don't expect you to be perfect, but (sorry to be harsh) they do expect you to be able to be confident enough to not base your self-worth on unrealistic media expectations.
If you really have a woman that puts you down because you are not a perfect storybook prince, then it likely has to do with her personal problems, and should not be attributed to women as a whole.
First of all, "The media hyper-sexualization of men is much worse than that of women"... how, exactly? I am sorry, but I just do not think that there is any way that you could make this argument. if one was to look at any magazine stand, and seek out the stereotypical male/female magazines (say, maxim and cosmopolitan), one would realize that first of all, there are MANY more male magazines that are centered around sexualizing women. Most "female" magazines discuss celebrity gossip or fashion. Second of all, looking inside these magazines, one can easily see that men's value comes from their personality traits (being especially loving or committed), while women are valued primarily for physical characteristics (flat stomach, curves, etc). "sexualizing" someone is seeing them in only objective sexual terms, so there is clearly more sexualizing of women going on here.
But disregarding this, I still do not see how unrealistic media expectations can be equated to treating someone poorly. The media always portrays extremes because that is what is interesting to the public. Stories about superheroes with six-pack abs exist to provide entertainment, not to show what all men should be like. Yes, they are seen as cool and distantly ideal, but women don't expect you to act like Ryan Gosling in The Notebook any more than you expect them to look like Victoria's Secret models. Women don't expect you to be perfect, but (sorry to be harsh) they do expect you to be able to be confident enough to not base your self-worth on unrealistic media expectations.
If you really have a woman that puts you down because you are not a perfect storybook prince, then it likely has to do with her personal problems, and should not be attributed to women as a whole.
How does this setting sound for my fantasy story?
Lukas
The country is called Marabecca, but its capital city is its center.
Bavel is a ornate city of wealth, capitalism, and politics. Its residents make up of merchants, moneylenders, slave-traders, glamorous idols and the pious. The city is beautiful and rich, but for many years the city (from poor to rich) has fallen into a state of rudeness, shallow entertainment, gossip, sensationalism, parties, overzealous piety, glamor, materialism, criticizing the lives of idols (famous people (i.e. celebrities), pity and less interest in education. Bavelians have countless holidays and festivities, mostly as an excuse to eat, drink and gossip more. One side of Bavelian culture is endless entertainment, the other is overzealous piety; followers of the main religion that worships Nobodad, which requires on having multiple children, strict gender roles, hourly devotions and asceticism. Some of the lesser sins in Nobodadism are burping, throwing-up, farting, nose-picking and scratching the butt, unavoidable but deemed shameful. The religion is monolatristic, meaning they believe other gods exist but are viewed as evil and less worthy of worship. It condones witch-hunts and slavery. Both sides of Bavel are equally paranoid of disaster and suffer severe patriotism.
There are two political parties that rule the city; The Grand Elders and the Grand Youths.
Grand Elders are made up of stuffy elderly long-bearded, long nosed men with aged wives. They favor and prize over dignity and when dignity is insulted they become enraged. They are wise, firm, traditional and favor the monarchy, though they have a habit of drinking and have a phobia of mice (mice are unclean to them). They believe tradition and discipline make strong people.
Grand Youths are made up of lusty young, big eared men and women. The support for the lowly and the destitute. They are hardworking and humble in their works, but suffer from stubbornness and behave like rebellious fools. They can't seem to control their irritations of the Grand Elders' stuffiness. They believe work and freedom make a strong people.
(its a parody of modern America)
Answer
I see some inconsistencies or things that weren't addressed but would cause potential issues in the story:
- Two such contrasting cultures cannot coexist in a city without some sort of segregation. One group would eventually submit to the other and the ruling class' culture would predominate as more and more people conformed. 1 culture is overly religious--almost superstitiously so--and believe in tradition, large families, and discipline. This blatantly contradicts the lazier, leisure-driven culture that favors entertainment.
- If the aristocrats are the Grand elders and favor discipline, then that means the Grand Youths must be the leisure advocates. Yet you say they're hardworking, humble, and impoverished .. yet they rebel against the traditions of the Grand Elders. Why would they rebel when their ideals mirror the those of the Grand Elders? Also, if they're destitute, how can they afford to enjoy the luxury of entertainment or to rebel against convention? They'd risk homelessness for an obscure cause? And how can rebels bear humility? Those traits contradict one another. You require a semblance of self respect and dignity to stand up against adversity and rebel.
This sounds more like the roaring 20's than modern America, where the youthful kids broke away from convention for a new, progressive, flashy lifestyle and image (flapper attire/lifestyle, luxury, glamour, individual expression).
Furthermore, nothing is mentioned of the economic structure of this city, it's exported resource industries, its agricultural/food production, or the currency and how the politics influence this. What about crime (contrasting cultures will always yield conflict), what about the emergence of other political groups trying to lobby for a separate goal that fits neither of the main parties (there's always a separation of loyalty beyond the two major parties, especially in troubling times). What about external influences like immigration and the diversity of cultures/peoples? What about imported products and how they impact trade? What about the technology of the day?
etc
It's a good start.
I see some inconsistencies or things that weren't addressed but would cause potential issues in the story:
- Two such contrasting cultures cannot coexist in a city without some sort of segregation. One group would eventually submit to the other and the ruling class' culture would predominate as more and more people conformed. 1 culture is overly religious--almost superstitiously so--and believe in tradition, large families, and discipline. This blatantly contradicts the lazier, leisure-driven culture that favors entertainment.
- If the aristocrats are the Grand elders and favor discipline, then that means the Grand Youths must be the leisure advocates. Yet you say they're hardworking, humble, and impoverished .. yet they rebel against the traditions of the Grand Elders. Why would they rebel when their ideals mirror the those of the Grand Elders? Also, if they're destitute, how can they afford to enjoy the luxury of entertainment or to rebel against convention? They'd risk homelessness for an obscure cause? And how can rebels bear humility? Those traits contradict one another. You require a semblance of self respect and dignity to stand up against adversity and rebel.
This sounds more like the roaring 20's than modern America, where the youthful kids broke away from convention for a new, progressive, flashy lifestyle and image (flapper attire/lifestyle, luxury, glamour, individual expression).
Furthermore, nothing is mentioned of the economic structure of this city, it's exported resource industries, its agricultural/food production, or the currency and how the politics influence this. What about crime (contrasting cultures will always yield conflict), what about the emergence of other political groups trying to lobby for a separate goal that fits neither of the main parties (there's always a separation of loyalty beyond the two major parties, especially in troubling times). What about external influences like immigration and the diversity of cultures/peoples? What about imported products and how they impact trade? What about the technology of the day?
etc
It's a good start.
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